Well, well, well. Here I am 13 days from my last blog. 13 days of eating anything and everything including being back on Coke. I really think I am an addict. All I can say at this point is that I need redirection and I need support. My church is starting the First Place program in September. Maybe I need to be where there are plenty of people to turn to when the going gets tough. Not sure what the answer is except I know Jesus is still the answer and He is there for me.

Week Three, Day Two

Oh boy. I think today I had no problem eating the amount of calories I am allowed. The girls and I ate at the mall. I chose China King. Now I had heard that chinese food has more fat and calories than you would think so I looked it up when I got home. Yikes! I think the plate I ordered had at least 1000 calories. Now that is just not right! Thankfully, I didn't eat it all. I left half my rice and half my Honey Chicken. I did eat the whole egg roll. I love those things. So, I am estimating that I had a whopping 700-800 calories for lunch. Even if I had a 1000 I am still under 1698 for the day. But, with leaving part of the food untouched I probably did okay. More later, I think I need a bike ride.

Deut. 30:11-14
Oh, this is good.

God is impressing on me that:
The strength that I need to do the right thing and His will is as close as my heart and my mouth. He has already given me the words. I don't need to look elsewhere.

I've share that:
I want the Lord to be very near me every step I take and teach me to lean on Him.

Thought for the day:
Sometimes when it seems easy is when I am not doing the right thing.

Challenge: My hope can be summed up today in the following words...
I hope that each day I get more and more lost in Jesus love and walk more and more in the light that He is.

Food Diary
I did not eat regular meals. I was too much on the go.
Breakfast: graham crackers, peanut butter/honey, Silk
380 calories
Lunch or Lupper (that's lunch and supper together) :)
China King food- mega calories! About 800
snack: salmon 183 calories
bev. tea and water-100 ca.
Total calories: 1363

Exercise:
Biking for about 10 minutes. That's all my sore arm could take.

Week Three, Day One

Now, it is getting down to the nitty gritty. I am being faced with changes that I need to make. One thing I have got to work on this week is actually eating more if you can imagine that! My fear of eating too much is causing me to not eat enough most days. That has to change because I am still not seeking the Lord enough about what I should eat.

Yes, the calorie limit really surprised me and I will have to wrap my mind around that because the old me is saying I can't lose weight if I eat that many calories. 1689? Are you serious?

Deut. 29:9-11

The Lord is impressing on me that:
That what matters is that I grow in Him and know His will for my life.

I've shared with Him that:
I need a radical change in my thinking.

Thoughts I had to day were:
About God's goodness and love and His power to change lives.

Changes I need to make in food choices:
I am not eating enough for fear of eating too much. That is not giving God control.

Goals for this week include:
1. Really seek what God wants
2.Cook healthy meals
3.walk and ride my bike
4.Eat more and better food
5. Encourage my partners

Food Diary (it doesn't look good)
Breakfast: almond snack bar, Silk
Lunch: PB&J sandwich,water
Supper:Taco Bell crunch wrap
snack: salmon
Not a fruit or or veggie in the whole days. Sheesh.

I didn't count calories today because I didn't do the lesson till night and didn't realize I was suppose to but I will from now on.

Week Two, Day Six Review

I lost 4 more lbs this week for a total of 8.

I have been going over in my mind what I have learned from the questionaires and I really feel I already knew those things about myself. I have known for quite some time that I am an emotional eater. It really hit me how much when I was told the store I worked at would be closing it's doors and my dream job would be over in just a couple of months. I had been losing weight prior to that and doing a fantastic job of it. I was well on my way to having 30 lbs. off when I got the news. I began to eat like crazy. Especially, sweets. But, then I started back guzzling Coke and eating McDonald's. Comfort food. Yeah, right! I was really feeling comforted when I put back all weight I'd lost plus 10 more pounds making me weigh in at my heaviest ever in my life!
I know that I know that I know that I have got to turn to the Lord when I want to overeat. If I can't learn to turn to Him for fulfillment then I am undone. That's what I hope I am learning through this study and the Woman of Beauty Study, as well. Oh, I do hope and pray I am learning it.

WEEK TWO, DAY FIVE

Hmmmm. Did this bible study start getting hard for you at this point? I don't know if I am not spending enough time meditating on the scripture or what but I am not receiving anything when it comes to questions like how am I going to change my view of relationships from now on. I think I need some guidance on this one.

John 17:20-23
God is impressing on me: I wrote that to be one with Christ is to be one with God and to be in Him is to be loved in the highest way possible. With love like that I should be able to conquer anything.

Food Diary
Breakfast: banana pudding
Lunch: Pastrami sandwich, pretzels, carrot, water
Supper: graham crackers and peanut butter, apple
Snack: laughing cow cheese -1 wedge

Fruits and Veggies: Not up to what I should have. Why is it so hard to work in those things?

Exercise:
Walking around Walmart with my son while he was getting his tire changed

Victory:
I was able to limit my banana pudding to one serving. I thought I would have a hard time staying out of it.

WEEK TWO, DAY FOUR

Ahhhhhh, I just got home from an invigorating walk in the Chickamauga Battlefield. I just love going there. Jazzie and I parked at Snodgrass Hill, got out of the van armed with lots of fortitude and a bottle of water and headed down the hill. We saw deer along the way. I wish I had brought my camera. We headed into the woods and walked about 20 minutes and then headed back. After 20 minutes of speed walking I slowed it down to a relaxing pace and enjoyed the scenery. So, I got a good 40 minute walk in and that beats anything I have done so far.

Romans 14:13-23

There is so much out there about what we should eat and what we should not eat that it can get very confusing. My Mom says, "Have a well balanced diet of all the food groups and eat in moderation all things." Dr. Malkmus says get off the meat, dairy, processed food and sugar and eat mostly raw fruits and veggies. Atkins says meat is the way to go! Other sources say eat 6 small meals per day and some say eat three meals and don't snack! It's enough to choke a horse, all these suggestions, opinions and ideas. I myself lean toward the all natural way. What could be more healthy than eating what grows in the ground or on a tree? I would love to be a vegetarian but once in awhile meat just tends to call my name and I have to answer. I especially love fish.

God is impressing on me:
I had a memory of when I first fell in love with my husband and how it made me forget food entirely. Wouldn't it be great to be so engrossed in Jesus that food just didn't hold any power over me?

I've shared with the Lord that:
Lord, I desire to have my mind so much on you and the things you would have me to do in my life that food no longer is what I think mostly about. I pray that you will help me eat to live and not live to eat.

To answer the question about resisting a food that would offend someone I was eating with. I think the only way that would come up is if they were on a diet and I was sitting there eating foods that they were trying to avoid. If I knew this about them then I would hope I would have the courtesy to eat something that would not make them feel deprived. If I was eating with someone who thought eating certain things was wrong then I would not eat those things in their presence either.

Food Diary
Breakfast: two pieces of toast w/butter, grape juice

Late lunch:
Ham and beans, cucumbers, tomatoes and carrots, tea

Even later supper, too late actually, so I will have to stay up three hours after I ate it:
Pastrami sandwich, pretzels, water

snacks:
apple, tropical ice


Exercise
40 minute walk with Jazzie

Victory today
I got some things done around the house that I had been putting off and I didn't overeat.

WEEK TWO, DAY THREE

I Corinthians 12:12-26

This is using the human body to illustrate how the body of Christ (his people) should be toward one another. Even though everyone is different there is no one who is not needed. We all have a function to carry out.

God is impressing on me: To care and to share in my sister's needs and to rejoice when they rejoice. To help them know that they are important and encourage them in their abilities.

I've shared with the Lord that: At times I am jealous of what others can do and good things that happen to them. Like when I see happy couples, it is hard for me to rejoice with them, but I know I should. Jesus wants me to. When others lose weight faster or are already slim I sometimes get uncomfortable around them. Lord, help me to have your thoughts and the right attitude toward good things that happen to others.

A victory I had today
I took a walk when I really didn't want to.

Food Diary
Breakfast: one cream puff, cereal and milk
Lunch: no lunch (ducking and running from Wyndy)
Supper: Ham and bean soup, cucumbers, tomatoes
Snacks: iced tea, apple
I had about 48 ounces of water today.

Exercise
I walked Jazzie for 20 minutes